- F U N H O U S E -

[isabelle]

PAGE 29

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THIS IS HOW HURT FEELS
AND IT'S EVERYTHING THEY SAY IT IS

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FEBRUARY 12TH

Back to thinking about Drake and her. Stupid stupid stupid. I really need to stop. I'm thinking I'm probably going to sneak out when it gets a bit later. Then I can head to Hogsmeade and get completely wasted and forget about the stupid pair of them. I could just get drunk here, I do realize that. But I need to get out of here. Plus, sneaking around will be a good distraction too.

Oh, I don't know. Guess you'll find out later.

... Actually, seeing as no one is reading this anymore, I should probably stop saying "you"...

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[isabelle]

PAGE 30

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ANYWHERE IS GOOD ENOUGH

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FEBRUARY 13TH

Oh god. Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck.

I can't believe I actually

Shit.

Went to the Three Broomsticks last night, looking for some Firewhiskey aka ability to forget that Drake and Annie ever existed. Ran into Kerr. Got drunk with Kerr.

HOOKED UP WITH KERR.

Fuck. Fuckity fuckity fuck.

I'm just excellent at this whole being friends thing? Ha. More like excellent at fucking all my friendships up. Drake, Lorcan... now Amory. And that's not even counting when I first screwed everyone over. Gah. I can't believe that happened. AMORY KERR. Jeez. Wow just... This is gonna be so awkward.

Okay writing in this isn't helping for once. I need to think about something else. Anything else.

The Valentine's Ball is tomorrow night.

Whoop dee fucking doo.

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[isabelle]

PAGE 31

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TO HELL WITH YOU AND ALL YOUR FRIENDS

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FEBRUARY 14TH

Guess what day it is?

Valentine's.

As in, ooh la la, my favorite day of the year.

Mhmm, it's a really good thing I never made that resolution to do away with sarcasm. As if. But that's not the point. Today is freaking Valentine's Day. Whoop dee doo. Which means it's also the day of the bloody ball. Which I am not going to. Under any circumstances. Whatsoever. No matter what anyone thinks.

I mean, honestly, why in hell would I want to go to this stupid dance? So I can be all alone and stare at stupidhead Drake and his stupid shinyhaired girlfriend?

Ha. No way.

No. Fucking. Way.

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[isabelle]

PAGE 32

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WELL, I'VE GOT A BAD FEELING ABOUT THIS

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FEBRUARY 14TH

Seriously.

Not.

Going.

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[isabelle]

PAGE 33

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TELL YOU WHAT I'LL DO INSTEAD

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FEBRUARY 14TH

Okay so uh... you know how I said I wasn't going to the Valentine's Ball? And then made sure it was really clear? Well uh, in my defense, I wasn't planning on going. Rose dragged me down. Not literally - of course not, she's a tiny little thing. But she told me there was no reason for me not to go (in her defense, she has no clue about the whole Drake thing) and then said that I didn't go, she wouldn't either.

...

Now, you have to understand, Rose is like the kind of girl who looooooves Valentine's Day. The hopeless romantic sort. I would have felt so unbearably guilty - yes, me - if I had have made her miss it. Because seriously, Rose has beeen amazingly forgiving about the fact that I basically pushed her out of my life over a year ago and all that crap and is so ready to just be friends again - I owed her one.

So that explains how I got to the dance, just not exactly how the dance itself was. I got there with Rose and then she pulled Lily Evans, little Miss Head Girl, over to ask who had won the awards 'cause we were kinda late. Now I normally wouldn't give a shit about the awards because they're well... stupid. Like everything's about Valentine's Day and school Balls. But guess who got awarded "Duke and Duchess"

Yes way.

Fuck them. Fuck stupid Drake and stupid Annie and all the stupid people who love them. I'm so over it. So over him. Literally. I made up some pathetic excuse about getting water to Rose and walked off - which I felt kind of bad about but not really because, see, I had a plan. A revenge plan. I'm not just going to sit around and be the idiot who gets left on the sidelines. Hell no. Whether I like it or not, he did hurt me. So I'm going to hurt him right back. And you know what? Payback really is a bitch.

Especially when it involves a certain Sid Darley...

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[isabelle]

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LAY MY BODY DOWN ON THE FLOOR

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FEBRUARY 15TH

So I realize that I left off on a slightly enigmatic note last night... So sue me, I was feeling mysterious. And tired. But anyways, I came up with a brilliant plan, to get to the core of what I was trying to say. Not to brag or anything but, well, modesty just doesn't become me. In any case, this brilliance involves moving on to the next, well not Valo because that's not his last name too but the next family member, I guess you'd say. Sid. Not that I'm talking about feelings or anything, though. I've sworn off those.

No. This is purely a physical thing. Merely getting up to no good with the one person at Hogwarts who Drake detests the most. Yes, I know how low that is. But it'll work. He's always been overprotective and this will hurt him. I hope. If he still gives a damn about me. Then again, I wouldn't be putting money on that... Except, I sort of am. Not money but well, everything. The whole plan hinges on that. And on Sid agreeing to it. He said he might. Come. To the Astronomy Tower at midnight tonight. That's what I wrote on the napkin I passed him. And what I sort of explained to him in person.

But really, Drake and Sid have had this little feud going on forever and this would be just another victory for Darley. We both have our own reasons for wanting to hurt Drake, or just mess with him or... Oh I don't know. So really though, I know he'll show. I mean what does he have to lose? Nothing. And what does he have to win?

Exactly.

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[isabelle]

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CLOSE YOUR EYES, JUST SETTLE, SETTLE

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FEBRUARY 15TH

Why am I having second thoughts?

No. This is stupid. I'm over Drake him. And the plan is already in action.

Revenge will be sweet.

Darley better fucking show tonight.

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[isabelle]

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YEAH, HE TAUGHT ME HOW TO HOLD MY TONGUE

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FEBRUARY 15TH

This is insane. I am not a patient person. Waiting does not become me. At all.

I tried passing notes with Kingsley. Sort of helped distract me. I mean, that's the only reason I even went to Muggle Studies, of course. 'Cause it would be a distraction from sitting around wondering whether he's going to show. Midnight. That's like... Eight fucking hours away. Ugh. Muggle Studies was lame, of course. I only signed up for that class so that I basically get a free period. As if I want to go learn about fucking inept muggles.

Plus, I'm pretty sure if I ever tried to talk out I'd be like flogged by all the muggleborns that take those classes. I don't mean any offense to them, per say but... Muggles are idiots. Fucking inept idiots that got drunk and ended up driving into out car instead of sticking in their own lane and killed Mom and Keegan. And then even the muggle doctors were too fucking inept to save them. Healers, on the other hand? They could have done it. Just goes to show you.

Then again, if I said all that in class I'd just get really awkward silence and pitying looks. And then some asshole would protest in a quiet voice how they're sorry but I'm still stereotyping the whole damn bunch. Whatever.

Hey, look at that. I distracted myself for a full three minutes. Whoop dee doo.

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[isabelle]

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TOO MUCH, TOO SOON
OR TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE?

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FEBRUARY 15TH

Okay so it's seven o'clock. And I'm going crazy here. He better show. He better fucking show. He will. Right? Gah. I'm not going over this again. I need to do something. I need to-

Oh!

Perfect.

I'm going to go find someone to spell one of my old cloaks so that it's invisible and then I can wear it tonight just to make sure that I don't get caught. I mean, I'm sure I'll be fine but I need to do something know before I quite literally have NO patience left and I throttle someone. And it'll be productive. So. Off I go.

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[isabelle]

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YOU'RE SKIN AND BONES, I'M A NERVOUS WRECK

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FEBRUARY 15TH

He showed.

That's really all there is to say. I just... Ha. I should feel happy, shouldn't I? This is what I wanted. Revenge. And I got it.

Screw Drake.

Oh god. Drake. He's gonna flip. That's the point, though, the whole point. There's no reason otherwise. Otherwise, it's pointless. Fuck, I'm just repeating myself.

It was

It was

Satisfying That sounds gross I don't know what to say. We did it. And now we get to hurt Drake. That's all there is to it.

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[isabelle]

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WAS IT EVERYTHING THAT YOU HOPED FOR?
WAS IT ALL THAT AND MORE?

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FEBRUARY 17TH

I don't what's supposed to happen now. Is that it? Or am I meeting up with him again? I know there doesn't seem to be a point to that, I mean, the only point is to hurt Drake and we've done enough to do that. But... I want to.

It doesn't have anything to do with Darley. It's not as if now I have feelings for him now or anything ridiculous like that, fuck no. But just... everything is falling apart The physical aspect. That's all I want. I just

Oh I don't know.

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[isabelle]

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AND I FEEL IT TOO

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FEBRUARY 21ST

Well that was... odd.

I was out on the lawn smoking, not even discreetly, I swear the teachers around here are so freaking oblivious, it's hilarious really, but then this group of girls came and they were being really annoying so I left. I thought I'd go the Willow cause there usually aren't that many people there. Well.... there wasn't "that many" people there. Just one.

Lorcan.

I have to be the luckiest girl in the world, no? Merlin, that was awkward. He made a few bitchy remarks about the cigarette in my hand, like whatever, I don't care. It's not like I'm addicted or anything. And then... and this is where I get to the whole "odd" part. He asked me for one? A cigarette, I mean. So I gave him one and then just...

Gah.

It was really fucking weird.

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[isabelle]

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AND I CAN'T PRETEND I'M NOT OVER THE EDGE

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FEBRUARY 21ST

I guess I made up my mind.

Met up with Darley again. Same place.

I don't why I'm doing this.

But I don't want to stop.

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[isabelle]

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THERE ARE DIFFERENT NAMES FOR THE SAME THING

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MARCH 3RD

You know the feeling you get when you're talking to someone and you're trying to figure them out and they say or do something that completely throws your speculations off track?

Yeah.

Exhibit A: Wynter LaCroix.

It's not like I was trying to talk to her anything, just told her to stop kicking my chair 'cause it was driving me nuts. She had some excuse, I said something back, we were going back and forth with this or whatever and then somehow the subject of parents came back, I guess she figured I have Mommy or Daddy issues. And then we just kept passing notes, both being pretty bitchy and just somehow it came out and

Her mom's dead too. And I told her that mine was. Is. And then it was just... really awkward. Unexpected. But then we ended up both admitting that the other wasn't all that bad - she said I gave her faith that not everyone was a complete waste of sperm and I said she didn't make me want to rip my hair out in chunks - and decided that we're a cut above the rest of the morons in this place.

Unexpected but kinda nice.

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[isabelle]

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CUP YOUR MOUTH TO COMPRESS THE SOUND

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MARCH 5TH

Ooh la la, Friday night and I've got nothing to do, don't I feel popular? I suppose I go find Rose but I mean... nah, I'll let her be. Just because she's my only friend doesn't mean I'm her only friend. And I know for a fact I'm not, she's got lots of friends. Because she's actually nice. But whoah, getting off topic here. Whatever the topic was.

Oh yeah. I'm bored out of my skull. Fun, hm?

Suppose I can write in my diary.

Except that I have nothing to write about.

Because that's how boring my life is.

Whoop dee doo.

I'm bored.

Very

very

very

ve

Oh, fuck this. I'm going to go find Darley.

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