Distractions (for Edward)

[bella]

Bella sat in one of the big comfy arm chairs out in the Common Room, her little white rat sleeping on her lap. Absentmindedly she ran a finger up and down Mipsy’s spine, unaware of the smooth fur she was touching. Bella’s mind was far off, thinking of much more pressing matters then her pet rat. Her mind was on her mother, like often happened nowadays. With her mother’s recent death it had been something constantly to think about, only having admitted to the death to Regulus and Brianna – no one else knew. Therefore, she could only ever talk about it when one of them was around. During times like this and neither was around, she was left to mull over it by herself.

She let out a long sigh, staring into the fire without really seeing the flames – she didn’t even know what time it was. Wearily she glanced over her shoulder, locating the little clock on the opposite wall – she still had a while before dinner. “Hmpth,” she grunted and turned back towards the fireplace. Mipsy had woken up by her movements and cast a sleepy glance upwards towards Bella. She grinned and ruffled her rat’s tiny ears – “Sorry girl,” she whispered. Mipsy ignored her completely, curling back up into a ball and falling back asleep.

With nothing to do and on where to go, Bella simply resumed her far off glance and starting to think about the long list of things that had happened and none of which she could ever hope to change or fix. Irritably she grounded her teeth, working through things that seemed impossible to really get through. This is stupid, Bella thought vaguely, decided she really shouldn’t sulk over it anymore. She straightened up in the chair a little bit and resumed her strokes along Mipsy’s back. She glanced around and found no one of particular interest to distract her from her troubles. “Perfect,” she muttered and rubbed her free hand over her tired eyes.

[edevang]

Edward yawned, today had been so boring. He had fallen asleep ten times from boredom and now he was working to stay up. As he walked around aimlessly in the common room, he noticed a brown haired girl sitting alone with a white rat on her lap. As his vision focused on her it became cleared who she was. Isabella Swan. He sighed. He didn't have much to do anyway. And he had been waiting for chance to talk to her.

Without another thought, he strode towards her and sat down next to her "Hey, Izzy" he said, noticing the weariness in her eyes "How are you today?"
What a stupid question, he thought, it sounded so phony 'How are you doing?'. Bleh. He could do better than that "Man, you look bored. Are you okay?" Yeah, it still sounded like a load of shit but it was better than the first question.

[bella]

Before Bella knew it, she was back in her sulk. She stared down at Mipsy, still running her finger over and over again along the rats back. Why could life seem so hopeless sometimes? Foolishly she wanted to blame her mother for everything bad that had ever happened in her life – it’s all her fault. For the umpteenth time her thoughts wandered to just what would have happened to her had her mother kept her; had she grown up with a normal family and had a normal childhood. There was absolutely nothing ‘normal’ about her childhood – Bella was the definition of abnormal.

“Hey Izzy.” Embarrassingly enough Bella jumped, startled by the voice breaking into her train of thought. She had to blink a few times before her eyes came back into focus, sizing up the little fourth year she’d never really officially met. They’d seen each other around and talked on occasion, but really that was it. “Um, hey…Edward right?” She felt stupid for asking, but she couldn’t honestly remember. Bella had been so focused on her own dissolving world she’d practically forgot anyone else existed.

She tried to focus a little bit more clearly, finally answering more clearly “I’m alright I guess. Just family problems. Not really anything to work myself over about, but I’m a master of over-exertion.” She smiled weakly and shrugged. “It’s not that important. So yeah, in loose terms I’m okay.” She tried to smile a bit more sincerely, hoping to wash away his worries. “What’ve you been up to?”


OOC: BTW, minimum three paragraphs per post; don't need to get on Jen's badside. ;]

[edevang]

OCC: Oops! Sorry!!!!

Without thinking, Edward ran his finger through his hair. A normal habit of his, that he couldn't seem to stop. When at last Isabella answered him, he almost fell over laughing. It was just so funny when she said, "Um, hey....Edward right?" Even though he stopped himself from laughing, his eyes still brightened a bit now that he was more awake "Yes." he said, trying his best to not burst out laughing. It was almost an impossible task, but he did it. He'd never knew a girl, or any girl for that matter, who could forget his name. This was pretty interesting.

He was pulled out of his thoughts when he noticed that she was fully aware of his presence and listened to her as she said something about a family problem. Wow. She got all tired over such a small matter. Looking at her face, Edward noticed a bit of sadness. He wouldn't ask about it. It might be too touchy a subject to talk about on a first conversation.

When she asked him, "What've you been up too?" Edward shrugged. What had he been doing? his memories were so vague at the moment, probably because of his constant napping"Nothing much." said Edward, noticing how she tried to pretend to be fine. Clearly, that family matter was important. Edward's smile faded,"Have you been sleeping lately?" he asked a bit more serious than usual. He couldn't help it, whenever he noticed another persons pain he just had to help in whatever way he could. Even if it meant being a bore by talking non-stop.

[bella]

Edward quickly caught Bella’s interest as he chuckled out a “Yes.” What was so funny about forgetting a name? Did he seriously dare laugh at her for being unsure of his proper title when she was in such a state? But that just made her feel vain, knowing it wasn’t exactly a fair judgment. She had to get out of this little “pity-me” phase quick or she’d never be able to get out. She’d been doing alright lately, so the sudden wave of emotions had sort of caught her off guard. “Well hello then Edward,” she replied, doing her best to hide her curiosity at his odd response.

She noted dully that he didn’t seem to focused on talking about himself, giving the standard answer of “Nothing much.” Was there ever really ‘anything’? Bella just nodded, figuring she best better not try and pry. For whatever reason, the more she looked at Edward the more entranced she became. He had some weird aura about him, something that was welcoming but frightening all at once. Like he could be a really nice person, but the moment you slipped into his bad side you wouldn’t be able to fear anyone more. The sensation it threw Bella into was almost enough to fully distract her until he mentioned her drowsy state again.

”Um, yeah,” she lied quickly, but knew it was wasted – she didn’t even believe herself. Bella sighed in defeat, figuring she might as well just tell him the truth. Or at least part of it. “Okay, well, no,” she amended, “My mother’s been sort of…” She’s been dead actually – and how is your mother? “…sort of difficult lately. I don’t really know what to do about her, that’s all. It’s kept me up a lot; probably too much really. So I guess to answer your question, no; I haven’t been getting a whole lot of sleep.” Bella had turned her eyes towards Mipsy again, making deliberate strokes now – it was almost hard to look Edward in the eye, and why exactly that was she couldn’t be sure. I’m intimidated by a fourth year, she thought, how pitiful. And yet she hadn’t really felt this calm for a long while.

[edevang]

Her reply startled him, 'Well hello then Edward'? He gazed deeply into her eyes and found exactly what he was looking for. She was curious, he was sure of it, the look in her eyes were the same as many other girls who were curious. He stopped himself from laughing as he continued to stare at her, not noticing the discomfort he was giving her. Then he remembered what Bella had said about "dazzling" people, and quickly looked away. He quickly preoccupied himself with looking around at his house mates faces. When at last Edward got bored of the pointless staring, he turned back to stare at Isabella, forgetting all about not trying to "dazzle" her. The dazzling part wasn't his true intention, what Edward really was doing was trying to read Izzy's mind. But his effort was pointless, as he could not break her barrier. This was one of the many things about Isabella Swan that intrigued him.

Never before had anyone been able to lock up their mind as well as she did......except for his sister. But his sister was his twin, so that wasn't much of a surprise to him. He pondered on a reasonable answer but was pulled out of his thoughts when she replied to his question. 'Um, yeah' she said it too quickly, his eyes flicked up to her face as he opened his mouth to say something she amended her answer by saying, 'Okay, well, no'. She finally decided to tell the truth. That was good. With open ears, he listened to Izzy talk about her mother. He felt a pang of jealousy. He had never even met his mother. The unwanted memory, that he'd tried to forget ,pushed itself into in his head. The scene of the common room faded away as he saw himself sitting near his parents coffins. Like an idiot. He could still hear the other people surrounding him, whispering and thinking. They thought and talked about him and how ridiculous it was that he didn't even know his own parents. He suddenly remembered exactly how he felt listening to them, and then how angry he was when he knew who had deceived him.

Edward felt the renewed hatred in his heart begin to pulse, without knowing his eyes turned onyx in contrast with his anger. Edward was still in his thoughts not realizing Izzy had finished. In his memory, he could feel the young boy he had been. He felt the desire he had wanted. The desire to murder his Aunt Susan for hiding such important and valuable information from him. The memory ended. After a few minutes, he realized that he was holding his breath, he let out a gasp. Looking at Isabella he thanked Merlin that she wasn't paying attention to him. Smirking slightly, his eyes turned back into topaz. "Isabella..." he said, looking deeply in her eyes, still forgetting about not "dazzling" her "What happened to your mother?" He had heard part of what she said and knew that she was lying about her mother. He knew he was prying but he had to know, no matter how touchy the subject. He was determined to erase the pain that was so obvious on her face.

(Ooc: Sorry for the long wait.....^_^)

[bella]

Bella was trying really hard to keep staring at Mipsy’s fur, but she kept slipping. It was during one of her failed attempts to not stare at him did she notice that his eyes seemed darker. But in the time it took her to look back up, they were the odd golden color again. And God, he was staring at her. Foolishly she blushed and looked back down at Mipsy, rubbing the rat behind the ears like she were a dog instead of a rodent. And she was doing a good job at not looking at him, until his voice broke her defenses: “Isabella…” She didn’t mean to, but her eyes lashed up and inserted rudely “Don’t call me that; it’s Bella.” She stressed her abbreviated name, but trying to be mean to the fourth year was a lot harder of a feat then she would have thought possible. He didn’t seemed fazed by her small outburst, “What happened to your mother?” His forwardness surprised her, and though she tried to conceal it, she was certain it was marked on her face. She’d never been good about keeping her thoughts to herself – her expression always betrayed her.

Idiotically she wanted to snap at him and tell Edward to stop looking at her – but that was stupid; why would you ignore the person you were talking to? But trying to figure out a believable lie on what exactly had happened with her mother was hard when he kept staring at her like he was trying to pry the very information right out of her mind. “Um,” she murmured, almost like she was confused about her own answer. Bella scowled at her hands, trying desperately to come up with a story with about as much success in her not looking at him. “Well…” How exactly do you tell someone something very painful to you when they don’t even deserve to really know what was going on? She’d known Edward what, all of five minutes and he was practically demanding to hear her life’s story. Something was very wrong with that, worst, she didn’t know how to not tell – before she’d ever consciously made the decision she was spilling out everything:

“A few weeks ago I got a letter from Ms. Drivels, she’s kind of like my caretaker, and she told me my mother was in the hospital and wanted to see me. I have seen my mother about four times in my entire life, and I don’t even know who my father is because I was given up into adoption. Anyways, so Ms. Drivels told me I should come down and see my mother and I didn’t’ want to. I accidentally told Regulus about it and he offered to come with me, if it would make it easily. Somehow I let his words convince me to go and we went to St. Mungos with Ms. Drivels. My stupid God forsaken mother aggravated me so much I ran out of the room and by the time I calmed myself down enough to go and talk to her, she was dead. Some nurse kicked me out of her ward and I’ve been an emotional wreck ever since. She’s always haunting me, keeping me up at night with all these silly nightmares. And now even when I’m awake I’m having nightmares. I have no idea what exactly I’m supposed to do to stop them. How do you tell someone that’s dead to leave you alone? And now that she’s gone, I have no means of ever actually finding out who my father is. I’ve tried to ask Ms. Drivels, but she never tells me anything, which is sort of odd as she’s always answered my question before. It sort of makes me think that my father is someone bad, and that’s why he left my mother. Not that my mother is a good person mind you. My whole family is screwed up – no, I take that back; my entire life is screwed up.”

Bella immediately clamped her mouth shut, fighting off going any more red at the realization that she’d just explained her entire story to Edward and warning back the silly tears that had began to line her eyes. Somehow asking about her mother had managed to open a flood gate and know he had every ounce of information he could ever need. Crap Bella, why couldn’t you have just told him to mind his own business and walk away? She waited in heated silence, fully prepared to be laughed at.


OOC: No worries. ^^

[edevang]

Edward didn't laugh. It wasn't something to be laughing about, "Well...I never met my parents...they were dead before I even knew about their existence..." said Edward. He never knew them because his Aunt Susan had decided to keep it from him. Such a wicked Aunt indeed.

He couldn't think such things, his Aunt Susan had tried her best raising him though she still had her flaws....she was his aunt. Edward turned to look at Isabella....so sad she seemed. Edward tried harder to read Isabella's mind. How could she have such a strong resistance against his mind reading? It wasn't possible....unless she took lessons "I'm sorry for prying....Izzy" said Edward, looking away ashamed of himself for putting her in such a difficult situation. How could he want to relieve her of pain when clearly he had put her into more pain?

His actions were selfish, he wasn't thinking about what would happen if he had asked her such a question. Another obvious fact was that she didn't like being called 'Isabella' even though it was her real name. "So, you don't like being called Isabella, eh?" said Edward breaking the awkward silence. He pushed his hair from his face as he turned to look back at her.

[bella]

There you go Bella – he doesn’t know his parents either. Stop being such a baby; the world does not revolve around you. But some day’s she really wished it would, and everyone would try and make her happy because her problems meant so much more then theirs. Silly wishing, but sometimes it seemed completely logical. Didn’t everyone deserve a day to be spoiled? Ugh, Bella, just stop. Stop. She was becoming a walking soap box – living like this was not good. Bella forced herself to smile, trying to look on the bright side. It wasn’t very light, but…

“I’m sorry for prying…Izzy.” Well, at least he’d seem the error of his ways. Serves him right. Bella let out a sigh, smiling apologetically. “No, it’s okay. I don’t really mind…it’s just sort of…hard. Please, just don’t broadcast it, okay? You’re one of the few who knows now…” At least it had gone better with him then Indigo. Now that was an entirely different story in itself – her behavior had been quite unruly and Bella still had yet to apology to her friend.

Almost involuntarily Bella covered her face with her hands as Edward spoke again, practically begging: “Please, stop saying that. It’s Bella.” Her stupid mother was the only one that ever called her that – her mother was dead now; no one would ever need to call her that again. But again, Bella was making a fool of herself. Carefully exhaling she dropped her hands into her lap and laced her fingers. It was about time she explained it: “I’m sorry, it’s just, my mother was the only one to ever call me that. It makes me think of her. I’d just rather me called Bella…or Izzy in your case.” Bella smiled weakly, but looking up from her hands had been a mistake: for being so young, Edward was a marvelously attractive boy.

decided OOC to have thead e n d

[bellbell]

RP discontinued.