sometimes it's just not okay

[Fabian Prewett]

You're the one who asked me for the johnnies. Well, you know you can't take advantage of her as long as she believes in that load of rubbish. Molly'd better be the only one giving me another nephew anytime soon.

Worried what her mum'll do to you if she thinks you want to sleep with her daughter?

[Gideon Prewett]

I know. We're not gonna do anything, and I mean anything, until she knows the truth. Besides, even if we did, I'd be careful. What, don't trust me?

Well, wouldn't you be if you were dating a girl who still believed that babies came from storks?

[Fabian Prewett]

Well, just make sure you don't get smashed off your arse around her. You know what happened last time.

Probably. Sounds like you've got your hands full with this one, mate.

[Gideon Prewett]

Yeah, and I'm never drinking again.

... I really hope you don't find this funny.

[Fabian Prewett]

You've got to admit, it's a little funny.

Maybe you can get through to her without talking to her mum. How about asking her cousin to talk sense into her?

[Gideon Prewett]

Maybe, if you're a tosspot.

You mean the one who runs the Chastity Club? I don't think that'll go over well.

[Fabian Prewett]

I didn't know there was a Chastity Club. Imogen runs it?

[Gideon Prewett]

Huh? No, she's related to the Pryce's on her mum's side. I thought she... I don't know what's going on with it, really, I'm not in it. Neither is Imogen, if you know what I mean.

I think I'll keep this between Jezebel and I for now. See if I can convince her to talk to her mum herself.

[Fabian Prewett]

Oh. Guess I should've figured she'd have more than one cousin. You really think Imogen's loose? She doesn't seem the type.

Good luck with that. Just hope your girlfriend doesn't come back from her mum with even more strange ideas.

[Gideon Prewett]

Well, I dunno. I mean, she's in my year, and you hear things about people in your year. And she's been really nasty and mean to Emmeline and Kiki, and probably Gabby too, but Gabby's too nice to say anything. And she neve hangs out with girls, only boys, and there are rumours that she does more than just "hang out" with them. And she's been chumming with Regulus Black lately, I've definitely seen them together. I dunno. I have a bad feeling, that's all.

Like what?

[Fabian Prewett]

I suppose, but you can't trust everything. Last year, I heard Lily was eloping with Regulus Black, but that wasn't true. How do you know she's been mean to Gabby? She seemed fine with her and Emme that time in the hospital wing. You've got a bad feeling about what? About her? If you've seen her talking to Regulus, it's probably her telling him off for ditching her at the ball.

Blimey, I dunno, like cockatoos bring you fresh unicorn's milk for the babies you get from the stork.

[Gideon Prewett]

... Oh, crickey, you like her.

Cockatoos? Really? Ugh, bugger, this is complicated.

[Fabian Prewett]

Sure I like her, we're friends. I dunno why your friends think she's awful, but she seems like a nice girl to me. Why don't you ask your girlfriend about her, find out what she's really like?

Well, who knows what sort of ideas could find their way into your girlfriend's brain?

[Gideon Prewett]

Yeah, okay, whatever. You really think you can stay friends, though? And I dunno, family's biased, and maybe she'll think it's weird if I start asking about her cousin, you know? What if she starts thinking I'm interested in her or something.

I don't know! But I tried telling her the truth, sort of, and it didn't work, so I just don't know what else to do, really. I mean, it's storks, Fabian.

STORKS.

[Fabian Prewett]

Yeah, I guess it might not be a good idea to ask your girlfriend. I dunno, why wouldn't we stay friends? I haven't got any reason to stop talking to her.

Guess you're stuck, mate. Unless you can get your girl to believe you.