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Post by Imogen Sauveterre on Aug 24, 2011 0:37:35 GMT -5
Herr Tosspot,
Who're you taking to the ball?
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Post by aidan on Aug 24, 2011 0:40:13 GMT -5
Kind Madame: ("Why what good manners you have, Aidan!" - You)
Who the hell do you think?
Oh, here, Imogen, let me speak in terms you will understand. That one super happy girl who sometimes wears a Cheerleading uniform who's been hanging on my arm for the past month. She's got brown hair, she's nice, and she kisses me a lot. Her name is Dani. Pretty sure you've met her once or twice. Merlin.
Are you going with someone?
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Post by Imogen Sauveterre on Aug 24, 2011 0:47:27 GMT -5
Is that really how you think I talk? Wanker.
Fine, I'll just call you Batman from now on. It'll be your code name. I'm sure I can figure out how to make a bat shape from my Lumos charm.
You're still with her? See, until you said "cheerleading uniform", one could easily assume you were talking about Alessa Congrats on the long haul.
I was going to ask you to be my back-up in case my date flakes. Buuut since you're going with your girlfriend, guess that's out.
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Post by aidan on Aug 24, 2011 0:58:59 GMT -5
Silly little girl, that's definitely not how I think you talk! I was trying to give you a lesson in common courtesies.
Batman? Really? Batman? Is it really that difficult for you to address people by their proper namesake?! ...It's just me, isn't it?
Thanks, chief. Now all I need is your blessing.
Really, Imogen? You were going to ask me? I am just tickled pink at that! Really! I don't even know what to say, I'm so flattered. You really know how to take a fella by surprise! But no, Imogen, I'm gonna have to decline with regrets. But I wouldn't mind stealing you from your date for a dance. Or whatever it is you'll attempt to do with your legs. Don't worry, though, I'll help. 
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Post by Imogen Sauveterre on Aug 24, 2011 1:06:00 GMT -5
La la la I don't give a shit about fucking courtesies la la la.
It is just you! The boy learns! Congratulations. And you should be flattered that I referred to you as the badass instead of his whiny super-rich-brat-with-too-much-spare-time alter-ego. What's his name? Wayne? See, it even sounds like "whine".
Sorry, I'm all out of blessings today. I was too busy giving mine to the members of the Chastity Club for joining the choir in a rendition of "Afternoon Delight".
Excuse me, my legs can do things you would never think they're capable of, you tart. But good.
It's Regulus Black, by the way, did I mention that?
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Post by aidan on Aug 24, 2011 1:13:36 GMT -5
A slap on the wrist for those naughty words, and another one for the attitude, missy!
Imogen - I - seriously - what the fuck is wrong with you HOW IN THE HELL What makes you think you can say that I have nothing to say to you right now Do you even read comic books What do you know about Bruce Wayne anyway? You're a terrible human being! Look at you! Stop Saying dreadful things about people you don't know! I mean, look at Tori, you used to haaaaate her but now you've actually got a friend who's a woman, what a shocker! I thought you were smarter than that, you crass twatwaffle!
^Above are my feelings. Make of them what you will.
Also, what the f frick are you doing going to the Yule Ball with that Grade A scum bag?
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Post by Imogen Sauveterre on Aug 24, 2011 1:24:53 GMT -5
Oh, no, not the wrists! Anywhere but the wrists! The pain, the unimaginable pain - unless that's what you're into. In which case, ew. Judging you.
... I... did you seriously just call me a crass twatwaffle? Let me guess, that big huge ink splotch is actually a picture of Bruce Wayne feasting on my torso in his designer suit with his best Merlot while his batsuit hangs in a corner. Although, ten points to Gryffindor for the creativity. I've never been referred to as a crass, twatty piece of breakfast food before. Kudos.
Well, he asked me. Same as why Dani is going with you, I suppose. You know, because she and I are clearly generous souls who are suckers for blue eyes. Or... wait, what colour are Regulus's eyes? I don't even know. I guess we're just suckers for poor, unfortunate boys who otherwise would be going stag.
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Post by aidan on Aug 24, 2011 1:39:32 GMT -5
It's a wonder you're as sheltered as you are. ...Until I remember Florence. Then again, maybe not. But no, the big ink splotch was childhood memories involving me pretending to be Bruce Wayne that you just shot with a rifle and KILLED.
Funny, though, because if I did not have my girlfriend, I would have asked you to the Yule Ball! And no, Imogen, I would not be poor or unfortunate, had I been going with you. I'd be the luckiest boy in the room. ("Aww, shucks!" - You)*
*Common Courtesies Lesson; also, if you don't say that, you'll probably hurt my feelings because I just said a really nice thing to you Imogen and that took a lot of bravery, gosh
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Post by Imogen Sauveterre on Aug 24, 2011 1:50:02 GMT -5
You, sir, have not even met the Queen of Cows. Besides, I think I like being sheltered. I'm completely comfortable being sheltered. I doubt you'd like me if I wasn't sheltered. I doubt I'd like me. I can't imagine being not-sheltered. I feel like it'd be cold and wet and weird.
TIS BUT A FLESH WOUND. Oh my god, Donnelly, get over it. Do you think Batman would get so emotional? He'd probably agree with me. Maybe I'll just root for another comic book character, then. Who's that guy bursting out of yellow spandex? The one with the mutton chops and ginormous claws? I like him. I bet he could beat Batman in a fight.
The only "shucks" I know of are oyster shucks. So... Aww, oysters! How'd I do?
Seriously though. Are you being a special kind of ass or are you serious? Because I'm not sure I know what to do with the serious business from you. It's kinda scary, actually.
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Post by aidan on Aug 24, 2011 2:12:40 GMT -5
Cold, wet, weird. There are definitely ways not being sheltered could lead you to being cold, wet, and weird, and it has nothing to do with the weather.
WOLVERINE?! Would you like some comics? God, Imogen, you would go for Wolverine. Sweet Circe, I should have known all along, there was a little comic book fan hiding inside you. I'll get you some X-Men stuff from my trunk.
On a scale of one to Grace Kelly, I'd give it an 8.5. So much potential!
I am serious, but hardly. Really, Imogen, I would have asked you. But not in a way where I'd be hoping to score by the end of the night. I just like the idea of treating you to a fun time, and it can't be hard, since you laugh at my stupidity and me all the time. Also, seeing you in a dress. It'll be a miracle.
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Post by Imogen Sauveterre on Aug 24, 2011 2:24:13 GMT -5
Yeah, I'm sure. But oh wise Nocturnal One, enlighten me!
You know what? I actually would love some comics. I want to see what all the fuss is about. Except I don't think I can take Batman seriously, and that Superman guy wears tights, so he's definitely out. But sure, give me this "X-men" stuff, and I'll give you my totally informed and super-educated opinion. And what do you mean, I "would" go for Wolverine?
Oh, golly gee willikers. I'll do better next time, coach!
Oh okay. And uh, I've worn a dress before, smart-ass. Once. Or twice. Ask Tori. Also, I wear skirts nearly every damn day in the bloody school uniforms. It's not like I'm completely unfamiliar with just air between my knees.
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Post by aidan on Aug 24, 2011 2:26:44 GMT -5
So, Imogen, tell me.
What else has been between your knees?
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Post by Imogen Sauveterre on Aug 24, 2011 2:28:15 GMT -5
Leather.
From a horse's saddle, you pervy old man.
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Post by aidan on Aug 24, 2011 2:29:57 GMT -5
You get a hypothetical cookie for that one, Imogen.
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Post by Imogen Sauveterre on Aug 24, 2011 2:38:57 GMT -5
And I shall enjoy its deliciousness slowly and thoroughly.
Now where are these comics you promised me and just why do you think I'm a Wolverine fangirl?
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