Post by Calixto Elias Bailer on Aug 18, 2012 18:41:42 GMT -5
[shadow=red,left,300]nobody said it was easy
no one ever said it would be this hard
oh, take me back to the start.[/shadow]
Cal fidgeted as he made his way through the halls, both eager and nervous to be getting closer and closer to his destination. The night of the Yule Ball played over and over in his mind; the shouting, the verbal and unbearably true jabs, Gracie’s tears, betrayal shining in Jules’ eyes...and Cal, the utter fool. Just thinking about what had transpired struck him hard in the gut. Three friendships had unraveled right before Calixto’s eyes, and it had shaken him to the core. He hadn’t been able to sleep that night of the ball, and even Christmas break hadn’t been the same without the usual visits to his friends’ houses for snowball fights and sugary winter treats. And now, after all this time…Cal could feel the massive wall between him and his friends with every ignored owl and each time they avoided eye-contact in the halls. He felt their absences in every study hall, the free periods they could have been spending together, and the ‘good times’ he found suddenly severely lacking. Calixto had never lost friends like this before, and he decidedly did not like this happenstance one bit. He had been working out in his mind how to make things right ever since the break, but a part of him was nervous that either they wouldn’t want him back or that he maybe didn’t even deserve their friendship. Another pang of guilt and despair rang through him, and he tried vigorously to shake it away. He had to be positive. And realistic (Julien had showed him that, though he was still trying to figure some things out in his head).
He would make things up to them, Cal promised himself. He would apologize and try to explain his side and how he truly didn’t understand some things sometimes, and they could talk it out. And hopefully take steps to getting back to where they had been before. Cal absently patted his bag as he walked; he had gotten Jules nice new Quidditch pads with matching red beaters’ gloves. He hoped the gesture would show Julien just how sorry Cal was, and how much he appreciated the Gryffindor’s friendship. He was willing to do whatever it took to get through to Jules, to win his friendship back (Jules and Gracie both, of course). With Serena Lovelace…Cal can admit, he was a little hesitant. He liked Serena fine, but he wasn’t sure her motives were pure anymore. Plus, there were some things that Gracie and Jules had told him after the ball that made him uneasy about the small Slytherin girl – his friends had never steered him wrong before. And Serena had said things that, well, bothered Cal. He was glad that he had given her the bracelet set and apologized for his mistakes, but he wasn’t sure he’d be hanging around Serena Lovelace very often anymore.
The Hufflepuff had gotten to see Julien speeding ahead of him, the Gryffindor boy unaware of anyone behind him. Cal casually followed his friend, staying both close enough to follow his every turn and far enough to go undetected (or so Cal hoped, anyway). It seemed like Julien had a specific destination, and after passing most of the classrooms, Cal figured that he had to be headed to the Concourse. Peeking around the corner as nonchalantly as he could, Cal’s suspicions where confirmed when he watched Julien enter the large open room. The Hufflepuff took a deep breath before pushing off of the corner and walking after him. This was it. He was really going to make Julien talk to him this time, he was going to make things all right. Entering the vast room, Calixto’s eyes scanned over the people in there: a couple Ravenclaws studying, a few Slytherin first years that Cal didn’t recognize, some visiting folks chatting with their loved ones, and finally, Julien sitting alone on a long couch and digging through his bag. Cal set his jaw in determination and came to sit next to the Gryffindor. He wasn’t quite sure if Julien had noticed his appearance or not, so he settled himself a bit more on the couch and cleared his throat.
“Julien? I really, really need to talk to you,” Cal said quietly. He paused for a moment, a part of him worried that the other boy would just get up and walk away. “I’m sorry. So, so incredibly sorry. I never meant to….You guys mean so much to me, and I messed things up so badly. I tried to make everyone happy but it just hurt you all.” He took a breath and chanced a glance at Julien, “I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said. That night of the Ball, I mean. You were right.” Cal sighed, hanging his head and rubbing his neck self-consciously, “You were right and I….I was an idiot.” He looked to the ground and prayed that he could earn the right to explain himself after all.[julien cross]
