Fiona Donnelly

[fiona]

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{ A B O U T . Y O U }

Name: Najooj
Gender: Girlie
Age: 17
E-mail: [e-mail]
Twitter: twitter.com/Najooj
Years of RPG Experience: lots. lost count, too lazy to go check what i said last time lol. over five prolly?
Other: Falco

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{ Q U I C K . Q U I Z }

How did you find us? Directory thingy
What about ISS inspired you to join? The activity. The people. The literacy. Everything XD
Do you have any suggestions for us? Noooope. Just keep doing what you're doing n.n

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{ A B O U T . T H E . C H A R A C T E R }

Name: Fiona Yseult ["Isolde"] Donnelly
Age: 14
Gender: Female
Year: Fourth
Face Claim: Shenae Grimes

Canon or Original? Original

Facial Properties:

the EYES

One of her least noticeable features (in her opinion) are Fiona's eyes. During her younger years, she had always been envious of the fact that her brother had been the one to adopt the bright blue eyes, which she got plain ole' brown eyes after her mother. To her extreme disappointment, the iris really is just that – not even flecks of gold or green. They weren't even unusually large or anything! No, instead, they were just completely and utterly normal. Not only that, but she had not been blessed with long eyelashes – they are naturally quite thick, at least. Besides, the lack of length can easily be fixed with muggle make-up. Her eyes are almost always lined with kohl, in an attempt to make them look more "attractive" at first but then later it simply became a habit, along with wearing make-up in general, although she doesn't go heavy with that stuff. She does realize that she's still fourteen (as annoying as that remembrance is, it is still true) and Fiona knows her limits. She doesn't want to be thought of as a sl*t when she's not even close.

the HAIR

This feature is always changing. Fiona's natural hair color is dark brown, like her father's, but it has been a while since she had returned to that color. On her twelfth birthday, her mother took her to dye her hair for the very first time, and Fiona fell in love with the idea of being able to change ones hair color so easily. In just a few hours, she could go from a brunette, to a red head, to a blonde! Of course, she never goes very extreme. Normally, her hair is in the range of medium brown, to reddish-brown, to very light brown, occasionally with blonde high-lights. Fiona's hair is naturally wavy, and she usually keeps it that way, although she does occasionally straighten it by magic, manipulate it to control the curls or simply make the end of her hair curly. One thing she rarely, if ever, changes, however, is her hair's length; she always keeps it at least below her shoulders. She is extremely attached to her long hair, especially ever since her mother's death. Since Ceara had lost all her hair during the treatment for her illness, Fiona had been unconsciously terrified of hacking off her own. It is one of those irrational fears everyone has that even Fiona doesn't really understand, but she thinks of it as the idea of having short hair simply being unappealing to her. While she thinks it looks fine on other girls, she has managed to convince herself that she looks better with long hair and thus should not even attempt to cut it.

the MOUTH & the FACE

Fiona's lips are naturally pink and quite plump, with the lower fuller than the top. When she smiles, her lips part to reveal relatively straight, white teeth. If you know Fi well enough, you might notice that she has five very distinct smiles: her full-out smile that appears when she's laughing or just generally happy. It usually lights up her whole face and stretches from cheek to cheek, often followed by a giggle or her "adorable little laugh". Then there's her content smile, usually without showing any teeth and her forced/fake smile which makes an appearance when around people she dislikes, or is in an uncomfortable situation. Her nervous smile is quite similar to her forced, although along with it come other symptoms of nervousness, like toying with her hair or shifting her weight from one foot to the other. And, finally, her flirtysmile, reserved for those she's flirting with, obviously. Overall, she has generally soft features, with an oval-shaped face, a rounded chin and high cheekbones. Her skin is naturally white, although it tans easily, and is dotted with a few beauty marks here and there, one beneath her eyebrow and then a few across her neck. Between ample cheeks, her nose is small with a rounded tip. Her eyebrows are of her natural hair color, and she doesn't bother dying them too so that they match her hair, finding it rather pointless and annoying. She is perfectly fine with people knowing that she often dyes her hair, after all.

Physique:

the HEIGHT

At 5'3 and a 1/2, Fiona isn't exactly petite, although she's not exactly tall either. Instead, she's somewhere in the middle, although at fourteen she's hardly done growing yet. She still has hope that, by the time she has stopped growing, she would have hit at least 5'5. Which would be a good enough height. Until then, she chooses to wear high heel to give her those extra few inches she seems to be lacking. There are only so many times she can crane her neck to look up at Aidan before she got a permanent crick in her neck, after all. Besides, not only are high-heels "theeee cutest things ever", but they also make her exceptionally long legs (for her height, anyway) look even longer. Which is always a plus. Of course, she discovered a few weeks into her third year (which was when she started opting for those instead of the more-comfortable sneakers and sandals) that wearing high-heels gave you back pain and blisters and it hurt to be on your feet for too long. But she suffered through it ("beauty is pain, right?") and soon she became accustomed to it. Sort of. It was better than before, at any rate. Now it didn't feel like her feet were about to fall off. Just that they really, really dislike her. Which is fine by her because she really doesn't like them very much either. They're too tiny, in her opinion. Which supposedly fits her height, but it's a pain trying to find shoes when your feet are tiny. It really is.

the FIGURE

Fiona is a health freak. She absolutely despises being lazy, and so tries to be active all the time. If she wasn't so afraid of flying (and heights in general), then she would have joined her House's Quidditch team. As it is, she tends to stick to the ground (or water) when it comes to exercise and what-not. Mostly, it's just jogging and swimming, although back home she tends to go to the gym every now and then. In addition to that, Fiona is also a vegetarian. When she was a young girl, she suddenly decided to quit eating meat and chicken all together ("the poor ANIMALS!" she would exclaim) and nothing her parents could do or say changed her mind. Now, it's more of a habit than anything, not eating meat and chicken. So it's really no surprise that Fiona turned out to be quite skinny. She does hope that someday soon her body will become well-developed. Now, she's at the awkward stage where she's still a "growing girl". Which absolutely sucks and Fiona wishes she can just skip this stage and go on to the next where she's fully "blossomed". But oh well, you can't have everything. As for clothes, Fiona absolutely adores shopping and, being quite the girly girl, it makes sense that she loves dressing up in pretty clothes. With her brother's on-again-off-again girlfriend, Alessa, guiding her, Fiona managed to develop her own taste in fashion and became absolutely crazy over everything to do with it, whizzing through magazine after magazine until she was able to look good – great, even – without her mentor's help.

Wand Type: Rosewood, 14", Demiguise Hair core
Wand Expertise: Excellent for Transfiguration
Patronus: Rabbit.
Boggart: Snakes. Last year [third], we went up against a real-life boggart and when it was my turn it turned into the HUGE anaconda-like creature. I almost fainted and failed to perform the spell we were supposed to. It was pretty humiliating. I felt like such a coward!

Personality:

A dollop of overly CAUTIOUS . . .

Fiona isn't the type of person who trusts in people that easily. Sure, she makes plenty of friends really easily since she's quite the people-person, however she doesn't let all of them in. There's no real, deep reason behind that, she just tends to wait until she really knows them really well before she takes the next step – and that's the telling-secrets stage and what-not. Not that she really has any secrets, but that's beside the point. Aside from that, Fiona is also cautious in the sense that she's not at all reckless. Oh, sure, she has her moments when she loses her head, but usually she's quite level-headed and tends to think before she speaks, thus avoiding hurting people's feelings by not being blunt and curbing her tongue. That way, no one leaves the conversation feeling hurt – usually. Of course, when Fiona does lose her temper, it's usually over something serious and it takes a while for her to calm down. The most calming thing for her is taking a jog around the lake, or even a swim in the lake to cool her off. Ranting to her diary always helps, too. Although she's not much of a writer, she still does faithfully write in it at least once a week, if not more.

. . . with a pinch of MELODROMATIC . . .

Cautious and level-headed as she is, there are a few things that cause Fiona to blow things out of proportion – for example, her brother's over-protectiveness. That really pushes her buttons and leads to a lot of hands flying and cheeks flushing and raising of the voice. Another thing that makes her lose it is Aidan and Alessa's on-and-off "relationship". She's been pretty much convinced ever since she'd seen their dynamic together that they were meant to be. Soul mates. Whatever you want to call it, they were it. So you can imagine how frustrating it is for her to see the people who she deems perfect for each other fighting all the time. Of course, whenever they break up, Fiona sides with Alessa, once refusing to talk to Aidan for three whole days because she was adamant that he was the one who had messed up. Usually, though, she tends to keep that part of her under wraps. Usually.

. . . with a teaspoonful of GIRLINESS . . .

Thanks to Alessa's influence, Fiona spent the last two years reading and learning all about fashion, as well as being taken on many of Alessa's shopping trips. This caused the girl to become absolutely crazed over fashion and shopping so that it became one of her favorite hobbies, along with photography, singing and acting. She absolutely loves dressing up, and dressing other people up, too. Makeovers are the best, in her opinion. Getting a slightly frumpy girl and making her fabulous? Simply amazing! What could be more fun?! Well…okay, there were a lot more fun things, but still! Of course, Fiona isn't completely a girly-girl, not in the sense of oh-mi-God-I-broke-a-nail-I'm-just-going-to-absolutely-DIE anyway. Sure, she loves pretty things, but she doesn't walk around wearing pink all the time (ironically enough, she doesn't like that color very much, much preferring purple), neither is she a complete ditz. She absolutely adores meeting new people, and while she doesn't drink she loves parties. Not that she's been to very many in her life-time, but she sees quite a few in her future. Or so she hopes. How else is she supposed to meet new guys to flirt with, after all?

. . . some essence of TOUGH SKIN . . .

Fiona is overly cautious, yes, but not for fear of getting her heart broken or getting hurt. As a matter of fact, Fiona isn't really much of a sensitive girl at all. She knows how to empathize with people, but she just doesn't cry at the drop of a hat. As a matter of fact, it takes quite a lot to reduce Fiona to tears. She hates weeping of any kind (whether she's the one doing it or otherwise). Her mother's death helped toughen her, making her realize that she needed to be strong and brush off anything that attempted to bring her down, because life always went on and she couldn't stick around in the past and let it go on without her. Grieving was necessary, of course, but she rejected the idea of staying depressed for a long time. This is why Fiona managed to bounce back so quickly after her mother's death – perhaps even more quickly than her brother, although she did get help from his best friend, and Aidan himself once he had managed to regain control of himself. She wasn't insensitive, of course she was upset that her mother had died and of course she missed her like hell, but she just refused to let this fact to control her whole life. Her mother wouldn't have wanted that. And she took this philosophy with her in other situations, too. She brushed off most things, and it is very few things that can penetrate her shield and really affect her. She hopes to keep it that way.

. . . and a whole lot of FLIRT . . .

Fiona is…quite a bit of a flirt.

…All right, that's quite a bit of an understatement. Fiona is a flirt. A big one, for someone her age. Ever since she hit thirteen years old and her eyes were opened to the world of boys, Fiona began sharpening her flirting skills by practicing on any boy she came across. She had never based much on looks – she was all for the whole "inner beauty" stuff – but since it seemed to be that the cute guys were most likely to respond, she stuck to that. Besides, Hogwarts was brimful with cute guys. Of course, her first few attempts failed miserably. Either she tried too hard, or she didn't try hard enough. She picked up the skill from observing people, though, and soon enough it came easily and naturally to her, almost like second nature. Of course, she stopped flirting with just anyone. Now, usually, she tends to stick to those she's actually interested in. Or, around her guy friends, she occasionally flirts playfully. They both know that it's completely harmless, though, so it's no big deal. Of course, this trait drives her brother – and father – absolutely insane. Which just makes it that much more fun, of course! True, it's not so fun when they start lecturing her about it. But hey, what's a girl to do? She can't stop her natural instinct to flirt with the opposite sex! That would be like betraying her true self…

…or something like that.

. . . stir the ingredients and the product: Fiona Yseult Donnelly

Beneath all that, though, Fiona really does have a good heart. She's caring and is absolutely loyal to her friends – those close to her heart, and even those whom she isn't really that close to. More often than not, she has good intentions. Academics-wise, Fiona isn't exactly the brainiest. She dislikes studying. The idea of sitting in a stuffy library all day and working one essays and studying doesn't appeal to her at all. Even her best subject, Transfiguration, is a bit of a struggle. She'd great at the practical work, but then when it comes to essay-writing and what not it takes all her energy to focus on producing a decent essay. The less interesting subjects, like History of Magic and Divination, are practically a lost cause. She's not even sure what possessed her to take Divination out of all the subjects available. By the end of her first year taking the class, she wanted to fling the crystal ball out of Professor Trelawney's window because all she could see was this white substance that was obviously NOT the future. All of Trelawney's talk of her "inner eye" being clouded was complete and utter codswallop, in her opinion. She should have heeded her older friends' advice and not taken it but, unfortunately, nothing else had interested her, and thus she picked it at random. And what a huge mistake that is. But hey, all she wants to do is pass the exam and just be rid of it. And then she could move on with her life.

And that, in a nutshell, is Fiona Yseult Donnelly.

Likes:
+ Singing/Choir and acting; The few things I'm truly passionate about.
+ Shopping. Especially for shoes; Alessa's doing, really. She takes me shopping all the time, and I fell in love with it, haha. Especially shoes. I love shoes. Shoes are awesome.
+ Photography; I love it, but I'm not going to pursue it professionally. I'd rather be in FRONT of the camera, thanks. I don't let anyone touch my camera, though.
+ Transfiguration; It's my best subject, honestly. Even though I think McGonagall is a tad too strict, and I don't like studying for it much...
+ Boys; Well...yeah.
+ Having fun; Doesn't everyone?
+ Socializing; I'm a people-person, like my mum.
+ Keeping fit; I like being healthy. While I can pig out every now and then on sweets and whatever, I tend to stick to the healthy stuff, plus I jog every morning and occasionally swim in the lake. It just makes you feel great about yourself when you're in shape.
+ Butterbeer; Yumm.
+ Pretty things; I'm a bit of a girly-girl, so that's expected.
Dislikes:
– Rain; It depresses me.
– Excessive drinking; I'm underage anyway, but as much as I like parties I hate it when people get too drunk. It makes them do stupid things.
– Discrimination; I hate it when people (i.e., most purebloods) judge me for being a "muggleborn".
– Snakes; I mean the actual animals, although I'm not so fond of most Slytherins either. But yeah. Hate snakes. *shudders*
– When Aidan is all "brotherly". Like, when he tells me off for just having fun or something.
– When people touch her cameras; They're my babies, so yeah, no, don't touch.
– Unsuccessful flirting; I don't like feeling stupid, and I feel stupid when my flirting techniques don't work.
– History of Magic and Divination; HOM = Theeeee most boring class everrrrr. And I dunno what possessed me to take Divination. Most useless class ever.
– Pickles; "I dunno. I just don't like 'em."
– Girly girls; "First of all, nooo I don't hate myself! Sheesh. I don't think I'm that much of a girly girl, personally. So I like pretty things and shopping and blah, so what? I just hate the girls who worry about stuff like breaking a nail and so don't do one "dangerous" thing, or who scream at everything that's not human (snakes don't count for me, those things are just NASTY!) and so on. So yeah. Hate 'em. Love my shopping buddies to death, though. They're good, haha.

History:

the BEGINNING & the CHILDHOOD

On a warm day of summer – the fifth of May 1963, to be exact – Fiona Yseult Donnelly was born to loving parents Ceara and Liam Donnelly. She was their second – and final – child. Her brother, two-year-old Aidan, seemed to accept this new addition to their family fairly well. Fiona was one of those lucky ones who was born into a loving home with seemingly no problems what-so-ever. Hence, Fiona grew up with a perfectly normal childhood. She was an unusually quiet child. While Aidan was curious in anything and everything (thus probably giving their mother high blood pressure), Fiona was perfectly content with simply staying cooped up in her room with her Barbies and doll houses and her other toys. She never wondered about where Aidan wandered off to, although he did sometimes return with the darnest things. The one time he decided to pick up a snake and bring it back, Fiona took one look at the creature and proceeded to run away screaming – that night, she had a nightmare about snakes and Ceara forbade him to show Fiona anymore snakes since she was obviously terrified of them. She honestly couldn't help it, they were just so…ugh, disgusting!

When Fiona was five years old, she met the De Lucas – more specifically, Alessandra De Luca. Her first impression was that she was completely and utterly awed. The house was huge. Enormous. So extravagant. You could play hide-and-seek in this thing and never be found! And then she met Alessandra – or Alessa, as everyone seemed to call her – and Fiona was convinced she was just the prettiest girl she'd ever seen. But of course she had to be – pretty girls lived in pretty houses, and this sure was a pretty house! At first, she didn't know how to speak to Alessa, who kept saying strange Italian words and then apologizing and telling her what they meant, but it wasn't long before she became comfortable enough around her. It was great fun, hanging around with Alessa and Aidan, although they often seemed to sneak off and leave her alone. At the time, Fiona didn't really mind. As aforementioned, she was a quiet and shy girl, and she was imaginative enough to entertain herself. Plus, she always had all of Alessa's toys to play with, and so she was perfectly content sitting alone in a room while they went off doing Merlin-knows-what.

little miss TALENTED

For as long as she could speak, Fiona had been singing. She absolutely loved it and, even as a young girl, she had a good voice. When she grew older, her mother swore that her voice was "amazing". Obviously, she had taken after her mother. When she used to go to school, she would take part in all the school productions – and, more often than not, she got the lead. On stage, Fi was a natural. People often complained about getting stage fright, or being so afraid that they felt like they were about to hurl – Fiona didn’t understand any of that. Sure, before a big show she would sometimes get a little nervous, but it was nothing compared to the thrill of actually being on stage and having hundreds of eyes on you. On stage, she felt at home. And, until she was eleven, she was on that stage every single year, sometimes twice per year. Her mother was especially supportive of this, seeing herself in her little daughter and never feeling prouder. Remembering how her own parents had been so unsupportive of her dreams, Ceara was determined to be different and so, instead, she encouraged Fiona more than ever to pursue that dream and to be the best actress and singer she could be.

And then Fiona got her letter for Hogwarts, like her brother, and she couldn't go to her old school anymore – and the productions stopped.

But before we get to that part, let's rewind a little…

the MAGIC

It all started when Fiona was about six years old. Her childhood friend, Veronica (or Ronny as she liked to call her), had dared her to climb a tree, convinced that she couldn't do it because Fiona hated heights. Now, Fiona was no coward (except when snakes were involved) and she knew Ronny would never let her forget it if she backed down. Plus, it was a pretty short tree, so how bad could it be if she climbed it, really? And so Fiona climbed the tree. After a buttload of sweat, and some tears of fear, she finally got to the top and sat on a branch, feeling accomplished and convinced that she had conquered her fear. She could see Ronny through the leaves, and knew that she was probably completely shocked. Giggling to herself, Fiona swung her feet, enjoying the feeling of being cocooned by the leaves, shielded from view. Here, no one could see her. Maybe climbing trees wasn't so bad after all, if it gave you this sort of feeling. Besides, her fear of heights was so silly! What was so bad about this? All she had to do was not look down and she was perfectly fine! She heard Ronny calling her to come down and Fiona shifted her weight, getting ready to grab onto the trunk once more and then –

Crrrrrrrrrack.

Fiona's eyes widened in shock and there were about three seconds for her to panic before the apparently not-sturdy branch gave way and she found herself falling, and falling, and falling. Two screams wrenched the air – one from Fi herself, and the other from Ronny. She was convinced she was going to die, and even closed her eyes as if that would lessen the blow – but it never came. Instead, Fiona bounced away harmlessly and ended up in a heap on the floor, unscathed, eyes still clenched tightly. For a whole minute, there was nothing heard but her rapid breathing and then Ronny suddenly squeaked and rushed to her side, shaking her, apparently convinced that she was dead. She gasped when Fiona sat up and they stared at each other for a while before laughing it off, the way kids often do. Fiona never thought of it again, even when there was another incident, and another incident. Weird stuff happened around Aidan, too, so she assumed she was normal if he could do it too.

And then her brother got the letter.

Apparently, her brother was a wizard. A real, honest-to-Merlin wizard! Apparently, the "weird stuff" he was doing was magic and he was going off to this boarding school to learn more about it – how to control it and stuff. Fiona couldn't get over how amazing this was, and was convinced that in two years, she would be receiving a letter telling her she could go to Hogwarts too! Until then, her parents continued making her go to a normal school, which she didn't really mind. Sure, the work was an absolute bore compared to what Aidan seemed to be taking (he wrote to her often – they communicated by owl post!), but at least she could carry on with her acting and singing in the choir when she went to school. Finally, the day came.

It was at the beginning of July when a letter came, addressed to her, informing her that she was to attend Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Needless to say, Fiona was over the moon. Finally, after two long, agonizing years of waiting, it was here – she was going to Hogwarts! The day she got her wand was one of the best ever. She'd gone through quite a few because, apparently, "the wand chooses the wizard". Or witch, in her case. At last, the right one found her and she simply knew as soon as it did. She was officially a witch. She couldn't wait to go to Hogwarts.

the ILLNESS & the DEATH

It was during the second year of her life at Hogwarts when it happened: tragedy struck the Donnelly family when Ceara fell ill. Twelve-year-old Fiona knew that something wasn't right when they came back during that Christmas holiday. The first day, they went to the hospital and her mother was lying there, looking so pale and frail – so unlike the Ceara she knew, who was usually smiling and flushed. Fiona couldn't believe her eyes. She hardly recognized this person. And then her father explained to them the basics – their mother was very sick. Brain tumor, they called it. No apparent cure. She could die at any time. Every second with her had to be valued, but they seemed to tick by too quickly. Fiona wanted to cherish every moment, but how could she if time was flying by so quickly? And they had only had a few weeks before it happened. The second of January, 1976: AKA, the worst day of Fiona's life. The day her mother died after a too-short (in her opinion) battle with cancer.

Fiona couldn't believe it. It couldn't be true. It couldn't be true. Her mother wasn't dead. She couldn't be dead. But she was. She really was. Dead. Dead. Dead! She never wanted to leave her room. She only wanted to stay curled up in her bed. Her father barely managed to convince her to go back to Hogwarts; she was fully prepared to just stay at home all the time. But maybe it was better to go back to Hogwarts. There were too many memories at home. She saw her mother in everything; everywhere she looked. Aidan was no help. He was practically a zombie, and never spoke to her. She was utterly baffled, and hurt at the same time. How could her brother not be there when she needed him the most? How could her brother, who supposedly loved her, abandon her at a time like this? This fact simply depressed her even more, to the point where singing or even listening to music hurt her because it reminded her too much of her mother. So she stopped singing and simply went about every day trying to be as normal as possible. When Aidan had Alessa, Fiona had no one – or, at first she didn't. But then her saving grace came in the form of her brother's best friend: Ian Fleming. He suddenly became the shoulder to cry on; the ear she could bend whenever she needed to until Aidan finally stopped being a zombie and actually did his brotherly duty. He was absolutely amazing; he was also her first real crush. It wasn't surprising, really. He was sweet and comforting and there for her – not to mention, he was incredibly cute! Fiona had no chance. It was inevitable.

It didn't last long.

&&finally . . . the TEENAGE YEARS

By the end of her second year, Fiona was over it – both her mother's death (a sign of which was the fact that she started singing again) and Ian. She realized that she and Ian would never happen, and she had just turned thirteen and her eyes were suddenly opened to the world of boys and the fact that there were plenty of other very attractive fish in the sea. That was all it took for Fiona to suddenly become extremely interested in the opposite sex, and she began flirting with practically every boy because, you know, practice makes perfect, right? That was her philosophy, at least, for half of her third year. Her father and her brother were ready to tear their hair out in frustration because of it – which, of course, was incredibly amusing to her. No amount of lecturing or reprimanding from either of them got her to stop, though. Besides, they should have been happy that Fiona was being girly, right? Of course, the girly part was thanks to Alessandra's influence. Ever since her mother died, Alessa had sort-of taken Fiona under her wing, showing her the ropes of being a girl when she became a teenager. Basically, she taught her all she needed to know about being a girl. It was that push that caused Fiona to become obsessed with fashion and the like. In some ways, Alessa took on the role of her mother when it came to shopping and make-up and what-not.

Fiona could never express how grateful she is for that.

Her extreme-flirting didn't last for that long, admittedly. After the Christmas holidays of her third year, she downplayed it drastically, sure that her flirting skills were pretty sharp now. Of course, she's still an incredible flirt, but not enough for people to start wondering just how innocent and virginal she is – which she totally is, of course. She's only barely fourteen years old, after all. Aidan and their father don't have to worry about that for a while.

…Probably.

Sample Post:

So I took what's mine by eternal right



Took your soul out into the night

What was he doing? What was he doing? To her, to himself, to them? What was he doing? Emery didn't even really know anymore. It seemed he'd lost any semblance of control as soon as he saw her in that dress. Blue. In that blue dress. The image cut through him. Had he ever told her how good she looked in his house colors? Too good. It wasn't good for him. It messed with his head, she was messing with his head. When he's come up here, everything had been crystal clear. He known exactly what he had to do. He hadn't particualrly liked it, but he'd know. Now? Now the lines were blurring and he wasn't sure of anything. Didn't know if he really was doing the right thing. If it was the right thing, how could she be so hurt? How could he have hurt her so badly if he was supposedly doing right by her? How could he leave her when he knew it was the last thing he wanted to do? When he knew that what he did want to do was to just throw her over his shoulder, take them back to his dormitory and do exactly what he'd been thinking of doing ever since he saw her in that dress. Those thoughts were pretty clear, although not any less shocking. No one - no one - had caused his baser instincts to come afloat like that. No one, but Jackie. But of course. Of course Jackie would have that sort of effect on him. She was different. She was special. He loved her. He loved her. And yet he was getting ready to leave her. Why? It made no sense. Absolutely no sense. His heart and his mind struggled; a constant battle of wills. At this point, he didn't know who would win. He was tired of hurting her, but that was all he seemed able to do, whatever he did. So what was the right thing to do?

His hands fell away from her when she pulled out of his grasp, falling uselessly to his sides. He remained rooted to the spot, watching her. Watching the pale moonlight bounce off her equally pale skin. His eyes carressed that skin, drinking in the sight almost greedily because he couldn't touch it. Automatically, his gaze zeroed in on her arms. He couldn't see them, but he knew they were there. Were there fresh ones? The thought sent a pang of pain through him. Would there be fresh ones after this? He didn't know which was worse: the knowledge that after the last time she'd done it again, or that he might cause her to do it again, again. His shoulders hunched over and he dropped his gaze suddenly, because looking at her hurt. He stared at his feet instead, rather blankly. Why was he doing this? Why was he doing this? He'd already forgotten.

He only looked up when he heard the sound her shoes made on the floor and, for one wild moment, he thought she might be leaving. His head jerked upwards, only to be taken aback when he saw her standing directly in front of him. And then she hit him. And again. And again. He barely felt it physically, but emotionally he felt every blow, wincing from that instead. "Jackie," he half-pleaded, half-whispered, although he made no mood to stop her. It broke his heart to hear her sob again and he wanted to reach for her again, but he didn't dare. She was off-limits now, wasn't she? He wasn't allowed to touch. But God, how he wanted to. Wanted to hold her and rock her and apologise for hurting her again, for making her cry again, for f*cking up again. "Of course you do. You mean everything to me, Jackie,"

he said in a rush, taking half a step forward and then catching himself again. But then she took those precious few steps that separated them and he drew in a sharp breath, hands frowing into fists at his sides to stop the knee-jerk reaction of holding her. She was close. So close. Too close. He couldn't think. He could hardly breathe. What was she doing to him? He let out the breath he had been holding in in a rush and sucked in another one - along with it came that intoxicating scent that was entirely Jackie and it took whatever was left of his self-restraint to stop himself from pulling her even closer into him. To drown in her. He blinked himself into reality, forcing his focus on what she was saying instead, and found himself shaking his head. Of course she was better than him. She'd always been better than him. Which was why he loved her. She completed him. He didn't say a thing, though. Getting her angry was not on his to-do list. He'd already done what he had planned to do. So why was he still standing here? Why was he still listening to her telling him that he was worth it? Why did he desperately want to believe her? Why, why, why?

And then she said it. I love you. And he was completely undone. Completely. Absolutely no hope left for him. Because she loved him. She loved him. He'd thought he'd known, but hearing it from her very own lips? His heart soared, even though in the back of his mind he knew she shouldn't. She shouldn't love him, couldn't love him, but she did and he didn't care about the should or could anymore. Who cared about that? She loved him, and he loved her, and oh Merlin what had he been thinking? Well, whatever it was, he was done. He was done being stupid. He was done hurting the both of them. For once in his life, Emery was done thinking. Which was why he said nothing. Instead, he closed the gap between them, crashing his mouth onto hers, releasing his hands from their fists so that he could wrap them around her, lifting her off the ground with the intensity of his kiss. He could barely feel her weight. All he could feel, all he could see, all he could smell, all he could taste was her. Jackie. Feeling dizzy with joy and lack of oxygen, he finally put her down, although he didn't let her go, pulling away slightly so that he could look at her, although he remained awkwardly bent so that his face was barely an inch from hers, and their lips brushed with every word he spoke. "I love you. Come away with me." He barely gave her time to respond, fusing their lips together once more. He hadn't been more sure of anything before in his life. He wanted Jackie. He needed Jackie. He loved Jackie.

And that was really all he needed to know.

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{ C O N T R A C T }

I solemnly swear that I, NAJOOJ, have read the rules, understand clearly what my responsibilities are now that I am joining ISS, and will abide by these standards set by the staff.[/color][/blockquote]

[Professor Albus Dumbledore]

ACCEPTED ! And she'll be joining them Hufflepuffs !