Breath of Fresh Air (Open)

[bella]

Bella could understand that…sort of. It wasn’t exactly the same thing, but she’d had a lot of struggles with her mother. Having been given up to adoption as a child, she had always resented her mother for it. And now, with her own flesh and blood lying on her death bed, Bella hadn’t even come to say goodbye. Maybe it was payback, she didn’t really know. But she often contemplated whether she should try and make peace with her mom before she left her for good. Was she making the wrong decision?

She had nothing to say to his words though, I mean, what could she possibly say? Any real words of comfort weren’t hers to give and blurting out “I’m sorry” because she felt bad for him was just plain stupid. Really, she just needed to leave but still she hadn’t moved. Maybe it was because she was within feet of a Slytherin and she wasn’t being hexed at – Bella wasn’t really sure.

“Do you still think all Sytherins are the same?” He was not giving up on that. She was well ware she’d brought it upon herself and knew exactly what he was looking for. Regrettably, she knew it was the best thing she could do to at least admit she was sorry for snapping at him. “Congratulations on proving an ignorant Hufflepuff wrong; are you better now?” Her tone was friendly enough.

[brett]

"Much, and the calling yourself ignorant was a nice touch," Regulus smiled rather pleased with himself. It had actually felt better than he expected. He pushed the remaining thoughts of his family aside, hopefully for a very long time. It was good to have gotten all that out though, who knew actually talking about your feelings helped make things better?

"You know I don't think this is really fair. I mean I just spilled my guts to you and all I know about you is your name, year and house," Regulus said as if this was just occurring to him. It was not a good thing from where he sat. For Bella to know all those things about him and him know nothing about her would make him very easy to blackmail. Hopefully Hufflepuff's didn't think about things like that the way Slytherin's did.

"So Isabella Swan, 6th year Hufflepuff. Tell me something about you I don't know," Regulus said as more of a request then a demand. Of course he would need to have something on her before he could let her leave his sight. Whether she would blackmail him or not was irrelevant at the moment, just the fact that she could would drive him crazy. Anytime he saw a Hufflepuff laugh in his general vicinity he would fear that they were laughing at him.

[bella]

“Yes, I figured it was the least I could do,” she sighed, shaking her head. Ignorant did fit her, sad as it was. She was surprised when he questioned her though – why on earth did he care about her life? As far as she knew, this would probably a once in a lifetime thing and they would never talk to each other again. What difference did it make to him? She almost felt wry, but decided it didn’t matter much.

“Most people don’t know I came from an orphanage,” she threw out conversationally, “My mom didn’t want me and put me up for adoption, but when they found out I was a witch they sent me to a mental ward.” She rolled her eyes at the memory. “It was rather very stupid and I’ve loathed both places since. Does that meet your requirements?” It was considerably personal information, but she wasn’t shy about that topic. It wasn’t anything that cause her pain, which in itself was probably a bad thing.

“I can’t offer you anything much past that. All of it would bore you; my life isn’t that interesting. Feel free to ask a question if you really want to know something I guess. I don’t really mind.” She had nothing to do and figuring this was probably the last time they’d talk, she figured, ‘what the heck?’

[brett]

"I would have appreciated if you acted liked you cared more, but yes that'll do," Regulus smiled. Not really what he had expected, but definitely all that he really needed. Though she didn't really seem to care Regulus wasn't going to tell anyone, he just needed something personal to even the score. She may not care much about it now, but he could probably find way to change that, but only if the need ever arose. He was not in the business of ruining lives.

"I'd say I'm sorry, but you don't really seem to upset about the whole deal," Regulus commented not really sure what to say. It seemed like being abandoned by your mother and then sent to a psych ward cause your different would tend to make you pissed off. He tried to thing of any actual questions to ask, but couldn't come up with anything worth asking.

It probably wouldn't matter anyway. They wouldn't see each other again...well at least they wouldn't talk to each other. Bella would go back to hating Slytherins just like everyone else in the school. And Regulus would go back to...well hating every non-Slytherin in the school. It was funny really, Bella had attacked him for being this Slytherin who hated people and only hung out with other Slytherins, but did she ever think that maybe it wasn't all the Slytherins fault? that perhaps the other houses weren't to blame as well?

[bella]

“If you want me to break down and cry over the matter you’re wasting your breath. My mother is a lowlife alcoholic who’s life is complete just because she gets laid every night – that is nothing to be proud of nor concerned about because I’ve only ever seen her probably five times in my life. She’s actually on her way to resting six feet under, so I won’t have to be burdened with her anymore anyways.” Against her better wishes, Bella’s voice had become hurt. She didn’t really care about her mom, but just telling him that she didn’t care why annoying her. What was her problem?

Bella had never been sore about the subject. Sometimes people would pester her about it, other time they simply shrugged it off and moved on with their life. Regulus was displaying the latter, unconcerned with her relationship with her mother. “Why do you want to know anyways; you don’t seem to be the kind of person who would care much.”

It was a simple enough of a question, but she realized the longer she kept talking the longer he would have to reply. She wasn’t sure what to do with herself. Bella had no real interest in talking to him and yet she had done nothing to excuse herself. Did she really care about his opinion? She highly doubted it, although that in itself made her sound horrible. She really needed to work on this ‘house unity’ thing.

[brett]

Regulus shook his head and smiled, "Have you learned nothing from what we've been through today?" he asked a bit surprised and a bit saddened by the fact that they had just gone over this and she already forgot. "Appearances can be deceiving," he smirked repeating the moral of their whole little meeting.

"You think I wouldn't care because I'm a Slytherin and we're all selfish bastards who pick on first years. But I already proved to you that we're not all the same. Family happens to be very important to me, so it's kind of an intriguing topic," Regulus finished, a smile playing across his features. Most of the other Slytherins seemed to hate their parents, or at least one of them. But being from the Most Noble House of Black made family important to Regulus which was why it hurt so much to watch his being torn apart.

"So, are you going to go see her?...Your mum?" Regulus asked getting back to the subject matter. Bella seemed to resent her mother, and Regulus didn't blame her. Still though something had crept into her voice as she mentioned her mum was dying. Maybe it was just resentment, but even if it was it might not be a bad idea for her to go see her mum and let her know. At least it could offer some closure.

[bella]

She smiled weakly, nodding her head like a child being scowled. Okay, so maybe Regulus wasn’t that bad…but still! Maybe she was just infuriated at being wrong, or maybe she was really upset over her mom, or maybe she just didn’t want to tell him and was mad at him for asking even though she had just offered him to. Bella wasn’t exactly sure what was going on, I mean, it shouldn’t really be that hard. Either way, whatever anger she had it was just channeling to him because he was there, not because he deserved it.

“Ms. Drivels was the person who came and got me from the mental ward, she was on old professor here. Anyways, she’s been with my mom and actually wrote to me a little while ago. She said she a could arrange for me to go down to Saint Mungos for a while, you know, ‘reply asap’ type of thing.” Bella paused for a moment, her lips forming a hard line. “I burnt the stupid thing and never replied.

“I don’t know her condition anymore. She could already be dead and I wouldn’t even know. I don’t really want to go, but Ms. Drivels said she really wants me to, just for a few days, over a weekend or something. That the woman actually misses me, like it was my fault I left.” Bella rolled her eyes in annoyance and folded her arms. “Its stupid I should feel like I owe that old hag of a mother for anything, why should I bother going?” she finished, amazed her voice held steady.

[brett]

"Cause she's your mom, and she wants to see you? So you can go and yell at her for abandoning you? Because it gives you something to do this weekend?" Regulus said offering up suggestion as to why Bella should go. The last one was really just for fun, but he did think she should go.

"I'm not telling you to go or not though, that's your choice to make," He added hoping to spare himself from a rant about having to grow up alone. He had learned a long time ago not to try and change other people's minds. He had tried to get his parents to accept Sirius and vice versa, but the both had come up with remarkably similar 'you don't understand what it's like to be me' speeches.

"But if you do decide to go, I could...go with you...if you wanted, for support or whatever," Regulus offered. Even as he was saying the words he was wondering why. He had just met this girl who really didn't even like him and yet he was somehow now offering to go with her to see her dying mother. He supposed he was hoping that since he couldn't put his own family back together, maybe he could do it for someone else's.

[bella]

Bella couldn’t help but laugh at that last one; she probably shouldn’t have but it was nice to have an excuse to smile. She didn’t like it when she was mad, and that in turn made her made at herself, which really made no sense at all. She’d really quite understood it. So maybe she should go…’just to have something to do this weekend’…

Did she really want to go anywhere near her mother? Instinctively she thought no, but Bella forced herself to mull over it. What exactly was she scared of? Seeing her mother? No, she’d seen her before. Being yelled at for not coming sooner? She could win that argument. Being alone with her mother perhaps, she wouldn’t know what to do with herself? She could always leave. Or maybe she was scared she would cry…perhaps scared that there could have ever been more of a relationship and she could do nothing to make up for lost time…?

Bella was embarrassing herself – she felt silent tears rolling down her face. She had told him she wasn’t going to cry, and not look what she was doing – she was crying. Hastily she rubbed her eyes rid of tears, knowing how big of a dork she was being. She didn’t care about her mother! Why was she crying over this?!

“But if you do decide to go, I could...go with you...if you wanted, for support or whatever…” Bella struggled to get her ground, looking up at him through her watered eyes. “Excuse me?” she managed to choke out, surprised how faint her voice was. But it was obvious he actually meant it, and for the first time in known history, she murmured “Maybe Slytherins aren’t all the same…” and actually meant it. She smiled weakly, unsure what to tell him. In all honestly it would she felt it would be easier to go if she had someone with her. Maybe it would be okay with him, after all, he had a broken family too. “You d-don’t have too, but…I-I’d like that,” she managed, gulping away more tears.

[brett]

“Excuse me?”Regulus fidgeted slightly in his spot, "I just thought that..." he stammered trying to explain when she spoke again. “Maybe Slytherins aren’t all the same…” Regulus relaxed and a smirk slowly stretched across his face. Maybe Bella had learned something after all. It was strange to think that a Black other than Sirius would be proving the stereotypes wrong, but perhaps Regulus was more like his brother than people realized. Actually he wasn't sure even Sirius would have made such an offer to someone he barely knew.

“You d-don’t have too, but…I-I’d like that,” Regulus smiled, "Good, cause I really needed something to do besides hang around the dungeons this weekend." He had remembered the first time he had said this Bella smiled and he was hoping that by repeating it he could at least get her to stop crying. Regulus was glad she was finally showing some emotion, but seeing a girl cry still made him feel awkward and helpless.

Yes, seeing other people cry made him feel helpless. It was Ironic, but he never knew what to do in the situation. Even now he was wondering if he was supposed to hug her or something. He felt it was still a little too early for that. True he did just agree to accompany her to see her dying mother, but that didn't require any actual physical contact. So instead he stood with his hands at his sides looking to her with a sly 'cheer up' smile hoping that would be enough.

[bella]

Bella made an effort to stop herself from letting more tears come, wiping her eyes again and gulping back the new ones. She nodded, agreeing with another little smile. So maybe it wasn’t the best way to spend a weekend, but maybe she could finally put her mother behind her once it was over. It helped that she wouldn’t have to do it alone, although she was still trying to allow herself in accepting it was Regulus whom she would be sharing the experience with. It was something of an odd comfort; perhaps it would mean more when they were there. When they were there...

For the first time in her life, Bella was going to willing go see her mother. She’d had scarce meetings as it was and going back seemed like a big feat. But glancing back up to Regulus she felt maybe it wouldn’t be all that bad. Although she’d make the mistake of looking at him, and felt ashamed. Just like Bella, he didn’t know what to do with himself. She sniffled back the last of her tears and gave an apologetic grin.

“You might just convince me after all,” she laughed shakily. “I guess I should go write to Ms. Drivels…she’s going to be so pleased…” Bella fell silent for a moment, staring at her hands. And then quite suddenly she wrapped Regulus in a quick hug. “Thanks; I’ll come find you later, okay? I have a letter to write.” Giving one last fleeting smile, Bella turned heels and ran back up to the castle.


OOC: Should I go make a thread at St. Mungos then? ...or rather, I guess...where will we put it?

EDIT: OOC: A Burden of Butterflies - wa la.

[brett]

OOC: Sure

Regulus returned the quick hug as best he could, but he was so startled he really hadn't had time to react properly. "Okay, great," he smiled at her as she told him the plan. It meant he would probably do best to steer clear of his housemates until Bella came back. Somehow he doubted they would be quite as excited about the new friendship as he was.

Were they really friends though? Regulus liked to think so, but at the same time he knew nothing could really come of it. It would be another relationship he would have to hide, just like the one with his brother. Why was he so different from his housemates? And on second thought, was he really all that different from them?

He had befriended her with the ulterior motive of fixing her family. Though it was a kinder ulterior motive than most he was really only being nice to her in hoping to make himself feel better. To prove that families can be brought back together and maybe there was hope for Sirius. Though there was a seared black hole in a wall of the house that seemed to say differently, it was worth a shot.